Tip 3: MAKE SPACE, FIND PEACE, BE QUIET, MAKE IT STOP…
Home Every Day with the Kids? How-to Tips for Care-givers from a Homeschooler Turned Educational Assistant
So school is closed, for a while. The kids are at home all day, every day. How to survive? How to have order vs. chaos, co-operation vs conflict, sanity vs. insanity?
I can’t tell you how to create a lovely always happy house full of kids, but if a tip or two might give you 20 more successful minutes in your day, then that could help, right?! What to do is a lot easier to figure out than how to do it, with all your hair intact and everyone still speaking to each other.
My Third Tip is directly linked to everyone’s survival: Make some SPACE.
When we were all at home, day after day, week after week, month after…okay let’s not get ahead of ourselves… When we were all at home all day, we got sick of each other. The introverts were trying to disappear, and the extroverts were bugging the heck out of everyone. And then all the fights in front of the fridge got really old, really fast. So.
To save my own sanity, to get the extroverts to back the heck off the rest of us, to teach my kids how to be alone and get to know themselves a bit, and to give them a break from sharing requirements — I started the One Hour Quiet Hour.
After lunch every day, everyone, including me, chose a space in the house, and a couple of things to do in that space. When they were little, that space was in my sight lines, and me in theirs. As they got older though, they went into separate rooms and shut the doors. They choose to take with them things like the Lego bin, the dollhouse, paper, scissors, glue, markers, other building toys, and books. Screens were not allowed, and neither was talking to each other across the spaces (although when they got old enough they sometimes passed notes under their doors to each other which I thought was adorable so I pretended not to notice.) I brought with me coffee, chocolate, a journal, a book, sometimes clothes to fold…and a pillow, just in case the beautiful nap fairy paid me a visit. We set the magically neutral timer, and everyone played quietly in their own space, no sharing required, for one hour. (We started shorter and worked up to an hour.)
It was bliss I tell you. And after a few days of this, the kids started to like it too, I swear. I make this claim based on the fact that sometimes they took their time emerging after the timer went off. Regardless, the real point here is that I emerged ready to do Act Two of this very long day. And you know the saying…If mom ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy. Truer words…so do it Mom. Do it Dad. Do it for the kiddos. (They had a break from sharing…and from fighting, which they really needed as well.)
I know, this tip isn’t rocket science! But this hour saved my kids from many a parent-inflicted trauma, I’m sure of it. And if you are an extroverted parent, it will save your kids from you, running their little lives 24/7. Most importantly, I got through it (8 years home-schooling) still liking my kids. And we all know; every success matters, no matter how small, when we are home every day with the kids. We are all in this together, even though we can’t be together. As Red Green says, keep your stick on the ice.
My first tip is The magical neutrality of a simple kitchen timer. You can find that here: https://medium.com/@shelleylittle.maw/home-every-day-with-the-kids-d5116b3ef259
My Second Tip is How to teach the kids to fight fair. And by fight I mean battle over something they both want. You can find that here: https://medium.com/@shelleylittle.maw/home-every-day-with-the-kids-a96c58b40a9
And here is Tip Four: Not a martyr or a tyrant, but a calm and assertive leader. You can find that here: https://medium.com/@shelleylittle.maw/home-every-day-with-the-kids-db42f354321d
And Tip Five: I’m BOOORRRED…https://medium.com/@shelleylittle.maw/tip-5-im-booorrred-6900c2cae0b3
